Famine

I normally change the channel when stories or documentaries come on TV and start showing photos or videos of children starving. Not that I don't care I do and the photos hunt me but I think what can I do. I give to my church, world vision and help other charities. When I see these things it really shakes me and I feel if I can not do anything about it why torture myself. I also think where is god and how can this happen but deep down I know the answer. God is not making this happen we are, he gave the world and us the resources we need to care for each other to feed each other. When I see the Crises and the famine in the Horn of Africa I see mothers holding dying babies looking to god for help and I know god is looking down on us saying help my children. It is not gods will for this to happen he has provided us with the means to feed our neighbors we are just not doing it. I am totally guilty of giving what I am comfortable with and little more.

I think I am not rich, but I know I am not by American Standards but by the worlds. If one of the people in the camps spend a day in my life they would think I was the ultra rich and when I told them I can not give more then I do they would not understand. I am guilty of thinking someone with more money should do something. We all want to live in country like the US and a world where no one starves least of all children but no one wants to pay for it, and everyone thinks someone else should.

This is a pretentious post and I know it. I am far from being Mother Teresa (I had to look up how to spell her name right) and I pray this passion I have will not fade with my next good coupon deal or the latest eviction on Big Brother. (yes it is still on the air)

I dont' know what I think posting this will accomplish for all I know only my mom will read it, it has been so long since I posted anything.

But for my part I am going to give more to this crises even though my contribution will seem small compared to the 2 million children at risk of dying it won't seem small to that one mother I pray will see her child fad. As a mother I can only imagine the agony of watching your child starve and not be able to do anything about it. It is just wrong and if I am honest I feel guilty that people woman and children our suffering and dying and I convince myself 99% of the time that I do enough. I suck!

I dont say that so someone will tell me I don't and make me feel better I say it knowing even as I give more that I probably could do more and don't.

Courtney